Out of Order
“Out of Order” signs are so frustrating, no matter how pretty they look. It’s a simple way of saying, “You had some reasonable expectations and have made a good choice in coming here. But because things break and/or people aren’t responsible, your life is being significantly inconvenienced. Better luck next time.”
It seems God has hung an “Out of Order” sign on the doors I thought I was supposed to move through. Now I’m frustrated, annoyed, confused, and inconvenienced.
Every morning I wake up and am slammed with the consequences of decisions that have put up “out of order signs.” Here is a thumbnail of what I wake up thinking about:
- The church I started 5 years ago has closed and my soul aches because of it
- I’m trying to sell my house in a down market
- I’m working towards relocating my family from the Midwest (Indiana) to the Northwest (Oregon)
- I’m re-evaluating my entire call to ministry
- I’m preparing for a major vocation change
Thankfully, I’m finding the Bible refreshing in all of this. Surprisingly so.
Let me paraphrase something Peter wrote:
For if you possess these qualities (faith, goodness, knowledge, self-control, perseverance, godliness, brotherly kindness, and love) in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. – 2 Peter 1:8
Ineffective & Unproductive…I’ve never felt more ineffective or unproductive in my entire life.
And that’s the my problem, right? I’ve been stripped of all the ways I’ve been measuring effectiveness and productivity. All I’m left with is how well I’m pursuing intimacy with Christ. That door is wide open and I’ve received an invitation to walk through it.
But is that enough? Theologically, I would say it is. Practically, I’m not sure my life has born that out. You?
Wow, I hear you, I’ve been wondering this week what it means to have intimacy with Christ. What does that look like in real life. I’ve always done well on getting the answers the teacher wanted on the test or getting the “A” on a paper-. Pursuing Christ seems so mystical-what does it mean for my heart to be alive to God-
@ Renee. What if intimacy isn’t about “getting it right?” What if the aim of the Christian life (intimacy with God) wasn’t about getting anything that resembles recognition or success? What if it is about surrender, service, and intentionally expressed love towards God?
Milo, I think you’re on to something bigtime here. We are bound so tightly to our modern notions of success in the church that I think it leaves many in the church, and especially pastors, under tremendous pressure to “succeed” in ways that God does not ask for.
@ Mark. Why is it that we seek success in ways that God does not ask for?” What do you think we are pursuing and what are we sacrificing in this ill gotten pursuit?